PTSD - Not just for soldiers anymore.

Our son is 9 and just this holiday season he was diagnosed with PTSD. He is on his 4th hospital admission since October because his rages are unstoppable. He is finally purging all the gross he has held inside for years and he cannot handle it.  Going through this process with him has educated Gary and I far more than we ever wanted to be on the subject.  I am sure that is true with all families who love someone with PTSD.  See we know that Bryson's trauma events are in his past...he does not.  When the memories come they come and they are HIS present.  We as a family live day to day hour to hour and sometimes minute by minute.  It is a constant guessing game.  What set him off this time?  Will he be able to use his coping skills and de-escalate this time?  Will we have to go back to the hospital?  It is a reality we are forced to accept even if we don't want to.  He is the one who lived through the horror and continues to and will until he gets all the help we can seek..all the healing that will come...and shines the light on every last inch of darkness deep within. 

You know as I sat in the intake room last Friday at the hospital re-admitting Bryson for the fourth time, Arapahoe High School just down the road was under fire.  It's ironic in the sense that as more details emerge about the kid who took his own life, it was apparent he has some things in his life that could be considered red flags by some.  I am writing this message today to mostly BEG you parents to pay attention to your kids.  Know who they hang out with.  Know what they read, play, watch.  Be a pest not their best friend.  Parenting doesn't let up when they enter grade school..it gets more active.  Bryson started his obsession with death when he was four.  He talked about it drew pictures of it, and asked to play war games.  Now I even had teachers and a trained Psychiatrist tell us this was normal boy behavior. Guess what? We listened to our gut not them.  We observed..we pushed..and provided a safe place for Bryson..and 5 years later he is revealing the horror he has endured since he was 4 years old explaining why death was always on his mind.  Also, to a teenager a traumatic event could look like something trivial to us as adults.  Such as a breakup, not getting the part in a school play, or a friend moving away.  I pray for you as parents for wisdom as you raise your children and humility to get them help if they need it.  God tells us to be thankful for hard situations and I can tell you we are certainly in a hard situation.  I do thank God out of obedience right now but He is quick to show me the progress already.

We are still Team Kangas and we move forward together with nothing but Hope.  Hope in the bible is also defined as strong and confident expectation.   We expect full healing that will come with time for Bryson.  Love you all and Merry Christmas!

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